Okay, you may be looking at that picture up there and wondering when in the heck did Miss Kitten Boheme get into reviewing makeup?! Well, the answer is I haven’t (at least not yet… although I am open to it if you want to start seeing makeup reviews from someone who still applies it like a six year old who found mommy’s makeup stash…). Trust me when I say that that up there is most assuredly a vibrator. It is the Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator and boy oh boy does it look like a real lipstick! Color me impressed (and speaking of color, the deep pink is totally a shade I would wear too…). But also…. what is the obsession with making sex toys look like lipstick? I’ve got the Womanizer 2Go… which looks like a comically oversized tube of lipstick, then there is the Iroha Stick which also invokes the look of lipstick even the We-Vibe Tango makes me think of lipstick that was twisted too far up and fell out of its tube. There is a lipstick obsession in the sex toy world that I just don’t understand!
But I’m also not really going to complain either. Especially not about the Blush Lipstick Vibe. Because a) I am kind of impressed with how much it actually does look like a tube of lipstick and b) it really isn’t a terrible vibrator for what it is. I am a bit bummed though that it is battery powered, I could really get behind a rechargeable, high quality lipstick vibe. But… I guess we’ve got to work with what we’ve got, and what we’ve got today is a battery powered lipstick vibe that I don’t absolutely hate. Why don’t I hate it? Well, in a nutshell… because it is strong enough to not suck and be a total disappointment.
Although… if we are being totally honest here (which we are) it is buzzy as all get out. But its not really buzzy in an “I hate this” sort of way… more of a “huh, its buzzy…but whatever” sort of way. For me its a very noncommittal buzz… I notice it, but it doesn’t affect the way I feel about it. Maybe it’s because I was kind of expecting it to be buzzy… after all it does run on a single AA battery… and in my experience (with some exceptions) battery powered vibes are either quite weak or they are strong but as buzzy as a busy bee. The Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibe is definitely strong and definitely buzzy. But like I said, it’s not bad… it’s strong enough that I can over look the buzz. A lot of the vibration does seem to travel through the body of the toy, I could really feel the base of it rattle in my hand while I was using it. It gave me a mild case of vibrator hand numbness.
Upon arrival, I opened up the packaging and pulled the vibrator out and immediately twisted it into the “on position” and nothing happened. “No biggie”, I thought… figuring I just had to open up the tube and maybe remove some bit of paper from the battery in order to render it operable. So, after some fumbling with it, I finally got the tube open and looked down into the battery chamber and…. “NOOOOooooooooo” it doesn’t come with a battery. WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE?! DON’T THESE PEOPLE KNOW WHO I AM?! DO THEY THINK I JUST HAVE AA BATTERIES LAYING AROUND?! Seriously, my heart sank in some serious disappointment. I have kind of gotten used to toys like Rocks-Off, who’s toys often run on batteries… but a battery usually comes included with the toy… that way I don’t have to run around my house frantically searching for something to make my new toy go. I was not expecting to be let down so hardcore by not finding a battery with the Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator… but man… was I ever let down! So, I did the frantic battery scramble… ended up stealing a AA from my Stunt Cocks crappy camera to make it work (if you’re reading this Stunt Cock… it absolutely was not me who stole the battery from your camera… we were…uhh… robbed… yeah…also your camera isn’t crappy… its… adorable). And while we are on the topic of batteries and their annoyances… inserting the battery was probably the most annoying part of owning the Lipstick Vibe, my fingernails are currently quite long and I had a heck of a time opening up the little disc shaped opening at the bottom of the tube then once I got it opened I had a heck of a time lining it back up and twisting it back on. So… that is something that could definitely be made easier.
Operating this lipstick vibe is probably my most favorite part of this toy. It doesn’t have any buttons to fiddle with, rather you turn it on by twisting the lipstick up (just like if you were twisting open an actual lipstick) then twist it back down again to turn it off. The downside of it having zero buttons means that the Rosé Lipstick Vibe is a one hit wonder… it just has a single speed and you’ve got to either take it or leave it. But, as I said above, it was adequately strong enough for me to reach a pleasant orgasm, even if it is mostly surface level strong buzzing. Also, its really fun to twist it on and pretend to applying vibrating lipstick to your lips… it’s like a lip massage.
The Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator is just such a simple toy with a single purpose. It’s mission is to simple vibrate at it’s one speed and give orgasms all while looking like the most realistic tube of lipstick I’ve ever seen a vibrator be. That’s all it does, there are no other bells or whistles. No vibration patterns, no other intensity levels… just the one constant speed (which I want to categorize as a mid to high level speed… but that is all subjective and may or may not register as the same for you… I know… that sounds like a bit of a copout phrase… but I’m having a hard time thinking of something else to compare it to…I’ll think of it eventually… and when I do… I will return…).
I feel kinda of bad that I don’t have a whole lot else to say about this toy… but there just isn’t a whole lot left to say! The Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator is a simple but nice vibe and for under $20 this is a great choice for orgasms on a budget! If you don’t mind having a single speed, this vibe is great. I can definitely see this being a nice, discreet vibe for travel and it’s not so expensive that if you accidentally left it in your hotel room it wouldn’t be the end of the world (I’ve done this… and sadly with something much more expensive than a $20 toy…). It is also very fun and would make a great gift for say… bachelorette parties or for any make-up lovers in your life! And its very not a sex toy look makes it a very non-intimidating sex toy for anyone who likes the idea of owning a vibrator buy is maybe still a little nervous about more traditional vibrators… the Blush Novelties Lipstick Vibe is smaller than your average vibrator but a lot more fun looking than your average bullet vibe! I think this toy is something I can feel good about recommending, especially for a toy under $20 (which lets face it… even buying a $20 toy feels like a total luxury splurge for me… so its nice when my $20 toy kind of looks and feels somewhat luxurious to match).
Ready to add the Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator to your makeup bag… err… I mean sex toy collection? Click on over to SheVibe and they will get you squared away!
The Blush Novelties Rosé Lipstick Vibrator was provided to me free of charge by SheVibe in exchange for my honest review.
