There are so many male masturbation sleeves on the market today that it seems pretty unlikely that anything totally unique could possibly exist. A quick google search will turn up sleeves depicting any number of orifices – both human and creature. If you can imagine it, you can find it and stick your dick in it.
So, I was pleasantly surprised when I stumbled across the SwoonKink masturbation sleeves. What makes it so unique is just how simple they are. There is no gimick, no pouty duck lipped mouth, no pert little asshole…. just a simple sleeve. That’s it. Soft. Simple. Functional.
Sound boring? It’s not…
As Archer says “I didn’t invent the turtleneck, Lana, but I was the first to recognize its potential as a tactical garment. The tactical turtleneck. The tactalneck.”
That is just what this is. The SwoonKink masturbation sleeve is what you have always dreamed of, a tactical turtleneck for your penis. A deliciously soft cashmere turtleneck that you can masturbate into. Honestly, how much more convincing do I need to be? Go buy one right now!
I discovered SwoonKink during one of my many Smitten Kitten browsing sessions. It was one of those products that caused me to do a double take. Sitting in a basket was a plethora of cardboard penises wearing what looked to me like sweaters. It took me a minute of staring at them to figure out what they even were, then I started laughing. A penis sweater! Hilarious! Who could ever possibly think this was a good idea… but then I started to pet it, to stroke it, to visualize the possibilities… and then I realized that this simple little masturbation sleeve was actually pretty brilliant. It combines three of my favorite things – up-cycling, super soft things, and masturbating! All this, in one toy!
Made from up-cycled 100% cashmere, the SwoonKink masturbation sleeves come in two styles, “turtleneck” which is pretty much just a cashmere tube with an open, ribbed top (much like you would imagine a turtleneck to look) and my personal favorite, the “hoodie” which is a cashmere tube with an added hood and the hood can be used either up or down!
Sure, I don’t have a penis of my own, so I miss out on some of the fun, but I love being able to give a hand job using the SwoonKink masturbation sleeve! The worst part about giving hand jobs (for me) is ending up with sticky, crusty, slippery lube hands or worse… using spit when there is no lube to be found and things are that desperate. This solves my problem in the most elegant way possible, as the SwoonKink sleeve is designed to be used without adding lube! The cashmere fabric is soft and gentle enough to provide stimulation without any uncomfortable friction. This surprised me, I honestly thought it was going to feel like I was giving both my hand and my partners penis some kind of rug burn as I pumped away, but my Stunt Cock never complained (and now uses it as his go-to masturbation tool).
Just to double check, I rubbed the sleeve against my clit, waiting to see if I got that dry burning feeling that lubeless masturbation gives me… but even I felt the warm friction it provides to be pleasant. So, whether it’s through great design, excellent materials, or plain old witchcraft – the SwoonKink sleeve works amazingly well with zero lube!
The sleeve is designed to be a one size fit all product. It fit my partner’s penis with no problems, and I’ve tried it on some of my bigger dildo’s with much success. If you posses significantly more girth than the average man (and the majority of my dildos), the sleeve may become a little snug. But, I think this sleeve will fit a wide variety of penises, no problem.
Another awesome thing about the SwoonKink sleeve is just how easy it is to store it! Unlike other male masturbation toys, there is no hard plastic case, no jiggly faux mouth/butt/vagina, there is nothing that would alert the casual observer that they are looking at a masturbation item. When not in use, you can just fold it up and store it in your sock drawer and no one will suspect a thing. Or, you can be like me and use it as a dildo cozy – because I don’t want my dildo’s to catch a chill.
Clean up is a snap, it just takes a quick run through the washing machine. Use the delicate cycle, in cold water. Tumble dry on low heat with other soft fabrics for 10 minutes. Reshape, and finish drying flat. If you don’t have a machine at your disposable, the sleeve can also be hand washed just as easily. The cashmere will get fuzzier with each wash, don’t be alarmed, you didn’t ruin it.
So, do I recommend the SwoonKink masturbation sleeve? Without any hesitation, this is a great big yes! Soft and sexy, this makes a great partner toy or takes your solo play to a whole new, mature level. I love that the maker of these sleeves is local to me (SwoonKink is based in Saint Paul, Minnesota), and they are making a very high quality product out of up-cycled materials – they fulfill my love of buying local and being eco-friendly! It is a nearly no mess way to masturbate, easy clean up, and the cashmere offers a totally new tactile sensation you won’t find with other “mainstream” masturbation sleeves and is worth trying at least once. Okay, sure, maybe the old dirty sock is similar to what you get here, but the cashmere sleeve is way classier, good luck trying to get a hand job from someone by offering them up an old sock.
Ready to purchase a SwoonKink masturbation sleeve for yourself, or a penis you love? You can do so directly from SwoonKink’s etsy page! Because the items are made from up-cycled materials, styles, patterns, and colors may vary! And unlike a lot of masturbation toys available for purchase, the SwoonKink sleeves won’t set you back much – pick up the Turtleneck for $23.00 or the Hoodie for $29.00!
The SwoonKink Masturbation Sleeve was provided to me free of charge by SwoonKink in exchange for my honest review.